Congratulations, new mom! You’ve just had given birth, and now you’re embarking on an exciting journey filled with love, joy, and occasional sleepless nights. Everyone around you wants to support you on this journey that will alter your life forever. Unfortunately, sometimes people may say things that are unintentionally hurtful or discouraging. That is why we have created this guide to assist you in navigating those discussions.
Many new moms have gone through what you’re experiencing, and they’ve come out the other side happy, healthy, and fulfilled. With that said, here are 12 phrases that you should avoid saying to new moms, along with 10 uplifting phrases that you should use instead.
PHRASES TO AVOID
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When are you going back to work?
This question can create pressure and anxiety for new moms, who may not have made a decision yet or may be struggling with the thought of leaving their baby. Instead, ask them how they’re enjoying their time with their little one.
You look tired
This comment can make a new mom feel self-conscious and judged for not looking her best. Instead, inquire about how they are dealing with the lack of slumber and offer to assist them in taking a nap.
Are you sure you want to breastfeed? The formula is simpler
This comment can be a sensitive topic for new moms, who may have their own reasons for choosing to breastfeed or use formula. Instead, offer them support and resources if they’re struggling with breastfeeding.
I can’t believe you’re still breastfeeding/pumping
Breastfeeding and pumping can be challenging, and this comment can make a new mom feel like she’s doing something wrong or abnormal. Instead, offer them encouragement and remind them that they’re doing their best.
Is the baby sleeping through the night yet?
This question can be frustrating for new moms, who may be struggling with sleep deprivation and may not want to compare their baby’s sleep habits to others. Instead, inquire about how they are dealing with the lack of sleep and give assistance if necessary.
Your house is a mess
This comment can make a new mom feel inadequate and overwhelmed. Instead, offer to help them clean up or simply acknowledge that it’s okay to have a messy house with a newborn.
You’re lucky you get to stay home all day
This comment can minimize the challenges and hard work that comes with taking care of a baby full-time. Instead, acknowledge that staying at home with the kids is a full-time work and offer them support.
You look like you’ve put on some weight
This comment can be hurtful and make a new mom feel self-conscious. Instead, ask them how they’re feeling about their postpartum body and offer them encouragement.
Why haven’t you lost the baby weight yet?
This question can create pressure and anxiety for new moms who may be struggling with their postpartum body. Instead, remind them that their body just went through an incredible transformation and it’s okay to take time to heal.
When are you going to have another one?
This question can be intrusive and create pressure for new moms who may not be ready to think about having another baby. Instead, ask them how they’re feeling about being a new mom and offer them support.
You must be bored at home
This comment can minimize the new mom’s experience and make her feel like she’s not doing enough. Instead, ask them how they’re enjoying their time with their little one and offer them ideas for activities to do.
Your baby doesn’t look like either of you
This remark can be hurtful and insensitive, particularly to a new mother who may be feeling vulnerable and insecure about her parenting skills. You may have expectations about how your baby will appear as a new parent, but genetics is complex and unpredictable.
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UPLIFTING PHRASES
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You’re doing an excellent job as a new mother
This phrase recognizes the effort and devotion required to be a new mother. It can enhance a mother’s confidence and make her feel valued.
Take as much time as you need to relax and recuperate
This phrase demonstrates that you are aware of the toll that pregnancy and childbirth can have on a woman’s body. It motivates her to put her own health and well-being first.
Your infant is very fortunate to have such a loving and caring mother
This phrase emphasizes the vital position that a mother plays in the life of her child. It can make a mother feel valued and appreciated for her affection for her child.
Take advantage of this special moment with your child
This phrase encourages a mother to treasure her baby’s first months of existence. It can teach her to appreciate the small joys of motherhood and help her make treasured memories.
You’re doing an incredible job balancing motherhood and other obligations
This phrase acknowledges that many mothers have numerous roles and responsibilities aside from caring for their child. It can help a mother feel acknowledged for her efforts in all aspects of her life.
Don’t be concerned about the chores or the to-do list. You are performing the most important task
This phrase stresses the importance of bonding with a new baby. It can help alleviate some of the stress and guilt that many mothers experience as a result of their inability to do everything at once.
You’re adjusting well to the adjustments that come with motherhood
This phrase recognizes that becoming a mother is a major life shift. It can make a mom feel more supported as she navigates the ups and downs of this new phase.
Remember to look after yourself as well as your child
This expression stresses the significance of self-care for new mothers. It can assist a mother in prioritizing her own well-being and avoiding exhaustion.
You’re a natural when it comes to parenting
This phrase is a simple yet effective method to boost a mother’s self-esteem and confidence. It can give her more confidence in her skills as a new mother.
I’m available to you whenever you require assistance or a hearing ear
This phrase provides a new mom with a feeling of community and support. It can make her feel less alone and more connected to others who have experienced comparable things.
In addition to the phrases to avoid and uplifting ones to say, it’s important for new moms to remember that they have the right to set boundaries and express their needs. It’s okay to say no to visitors or to ask for help when needed. Taking care of a newborn is a full-time task, and new mothers should prioritize their own health so they can provide the best care possible for their infant.
It is acceptable that what works for one mother may not work for another. Instead of judging or criticizing one another, the greatest thing we can do as a community is to uplift and support one another.
Being a new mother is a thrilling and life-changing experience.However, it can also be overwhelming and challenging, especially when faced with hurtful or discouraging comments. By avoiding certain phrases and using uplifting ones instead, we can create a more positive and supportive environment for new moms. Remember to be gentle with yourself, to seek assistance when necessary, and to treasure every minute with your child.
